Member-only story
At first, I was just angry that the food I ordered through GrubHub was not what I expected — I anticipated the coffee being in a cup and the food relatively dry. Instead, I ended up with a dozen donuts and two muffin breakfast sandwiches steeped in that delicious Dunkin coffee we all love. What?
After contacting GrubHub and the driver, I have come to think this might perhaps be a deliberate beta test of a new menu item: the pre-dunked doughnut,
No more having to wrestle open 9888 degree cups of coffee in flimsy containers a few hours before you want to drink it with your doughnuts. No need to worry about the doughnut crumbs circling the cup because your implements to fish them out are limited to napkins. an empty cream packet, and the stylus from your phone. No wasted time between your pit stop and your morning destination.
Because Dunkin dunks them for you BEFORE you buy them just enough to infuse the doughnuts with that coffee taste but not enough to fall apart.
Genius!
I would never have thought of it. I would never have thought to put a box of a dozen doughnuts on the bottom of the bag and then carefully balance two cups of hot beverage with the lids ajar just enough to allow for dunking, but not affecting the integrity of the bag.
I also would not have thought to bar delivery drivers from opening the bag with the hot coffee to adjust packing for safety reasons and thus disrupt the pre-dunking process.
See, I would have packed the food in one bag and put the beverages in a carrier to be delivered separate and apart. How very bourgeois and mundane of me.
And, wow, what an honor to be part of this beta test. Don’t worry, the good people at Dunkin and GrubHub refunded my money and suggested I order again to get a more traditional doughnut delivery. I barely minded that they didn’t compensate me for the wasted time, money, and lack of breakfast because I was part of a beta test! No coupon, no apology, no doughnuts. Or coffee.
For the record, the driver didn’t seem to be factored in to the equation even when I asked how to enure they were still paid. There’s me with my dated concerns about labor rights, silly woman.
So sure I did delete my GrubHub app and swing by a local bakery for doughnuts.
It is my own beta test to support businesses that separate the doughnuts from the coffee.
Delicious.
